FUN & QUIRKY STUFF
~You know that little squirt of mustard water that sprays out of the bottle if you don't shake it up? Musquirt? That’s the worst! I just got a dose on my sandwich and my sleeve. But, I’m thanking God for the free grub!
~The clock in the studio is already set to Daylight Savings Time! We don’t “spring forward” until March 10 (2024)! I’m guessing the morning team wants to make sure we don’t forget! If I leave an hour early tonight, you’ll know why.
~I have a slight dilemma. What do you do if you eat all your carrots, but you still have some of the good ranch dressing left? Do you go back for more carrots or a spoon? I’m leaning toward the spoon to be honest…
~As believers we strive to do everything for the glory of God. We want to hear Him tell us well done one day. Well, keep it up, but remember, well done is for good and faithful servants, not steaks.
~If you’ve ever wondered how a vegetarian finds a comfort food dish without pasta or rice, well I figured out the key. It’s cauliflower rice! Mix in some mushrooms, Alfredo cheese sauce and Paula Dean butter, ya’ll!
~The other day I had to make three U-turns to get where I was going, and my GPS was huffing and rolling her eyes. Again?! Recalculating... Jesus GPS…that’s what I need.
~I love these food packages. If you’re watching your diet this month, the marketing can be tricky. The beef stick I just ate said ZERO sugar, 4 grams of protein and in smaller letters: NOT A LOW CALORIE FOOD. And there was no mention of the fat content. I ate it anyway…
~Pro Tip: When you have a friend checking on your house and your cat when you're out of town, it's a good idea to let them know the burglar alarm is set. Oops. It's always an adventure being my friend...
~The key to dressing in winter is LAYERS! But, apparently (co-worker) missed that cold weather 101 class. I had to peel off a couple of those layers when I came in the studio because the heater was cranked up into the stratosphere!
~Advice for Southerners driving in the snow and ice: Pretend your taking your grandma to church. There's a platter of biscuits and two gallons of sweet tea in glass jars in the back seat. She's wearing a new dress and holding a crock pot full of gravy. You're good to go!
~I left my travel mug in my car yesterday, so there was a frozen chunk of old coffee in the bottom! Good thing I didn't leave that 12- pack of Cherry Coke in my trunk. So, when the temps plummet below freezing, bring in your plants, your pets and your stray cups!
~There's an old song called Slip, Sliding Away. That's what many of us have been doing in this winter weather. Here's the advice from the weather experts: Southerners: You need to just stay home. Northerners: You're gonna need your big coat.
~So I showed up to my doctor’s appointment today proud of myself that I was actually on time, and they couldn’t find me on the schedule. Apparently, I was a week early for my checkup. So, I’m setting up my Google Assistant. “Hey, Google. Organize my life, please.”
~I have the perfect pair of jeans. I bought them when I hit my goal weight. So, now I don’t even need to get on the scale. When they don’t fit, it’s like they’re telling me “Step away from the chips and dip and nobody gets hurt!”
~ Many of us are back to counting our calories and watching what we eat in the New Year. Well, I’m good on my carbs, but my app says I have only 3 grams of fat left for the day. So, it looks like I can have 20 stalks of celery with ONE tablespoon of low fat ranch dressing for a snack! Yummy!
~I’m doing a low-carb diet and my total carb count for dinner was only 6 grams! (Tuna, keto bread and cheddar cheese) So, I have 40 carbs left for the day. I looked at the pop tarts in the kitchen, and one is 35 carbs...Somebody talk me out of it!
~Praying for the day when I can breathe through both nostrils again! What’s your best remedy?
[Listener and Reddit suggestions:]
-Forbidden midnight snacks to take your mind off your suffering! It couldn't hurt anything, but the number on your scale.
-Hot beverages - It’s a physiological effect of the drink where the taste, smell and temperature promote salivation and air-way mucus secretions to lubricate and soothe the upper air-ways. That might be TMI!
-Spicy foods - Capsaicin irritates mucous membranes, which results in a runny nose, thereby softening any nasal obstruction. At this point, I'm open to snorting some Tabasco sauce (Ahhh!) Don't do that! We might have to call an ambulance!
-Very light physical activity. The body goes "Oh! I have to move. That means I have to breathe!" The actual science: You can loosen sinus congestion and pressure through the increase in circulation. Increasing your body's core temperature also loosens mucus.
~If you see a reel in your feed that says Amazon finds you need….don’t click on it! It’s a lie. Take a shopping break!
~Don't forget to set your scales back 15 pounds on Wednesday night! [Thanksgiving]
~My motto this holiday season: "Eat, drink and be thankful for stretchy pants!
~Apparently (co-worker) and I are related. We both come from families that consider gravy a beverage! May your gravy boat runneth over! [Fill My Cup, Andrew Rip]
~This is something you'll hear a lot during the holidays: "I'm so stuffed, I can't eat one more bite! Oh, look! Pie!"
~It wouldn't be the holidays without turkeys, fruitcakes, and nuts. But enough about the relatives...
~Do you have your stretchy pants ready? The good thing about holiday feasts is that no more how much we gain, at least our shoes will still fit!
~I hear Thanksgiving travel is going a lot smoother than last year. And, some of the boarding rules have changed. Not so for Tim Hawkins! [Air Travel]
~Leftovers from the staff birthdays. So, if it’s low carb ice cream, zero sugar chocolate sauce, it’s OK to have a sundae for my dinner? Right? Too late. Better to ask forgiveness than permission.
~What are the odds that a snake would fall out of the sky and wrap itself around your arm, and then the hawk that dropped it attacks the snake and your arm to get it back? Imagine being that person. Well it actually happened to a woman doing yard work in Silsbee, Texas near Beaumont! Her glasses saved her from a snake bite, but the hawk’s claws did some damage to her arm. She’s OK, and has a whopper of a story to tell!
~It’s yard sprucing up season, and if you like garden gnomes, I apologize in advance. I’ve never been a fan of the cute – but creepy little guys, but I just might buy this one. It’s a T-Rex clutching several gnomes in its claws and teeth. It’s called the Great Garden Gnome Massacre. Just take my money!
~Can laundry ever be DONE? Everything washed, dried, and put away? Husbands don't seem to understand that laundry is always in the process of being done, but NEVER completely done, unless you count that 10 minutes that the hamper is empty after the last load is put away! If you’ve figured that one out, let me know!
~The a/c in the studio sounded like an espresso machine. I don’t know if that’s good or bad, but now I want a latte.
~OK, guys, you’re on. Call me with your best Dad joked. I'll start:
I thought the dryer was shrinking my clothes. Turns out it was the refrigerator all along.
How do celebrities stay cool? They have many fans.
What's Forrest Gump's Facebook password? 1forest1.
What do you call it when Batman skips church? Christian Bale.
What time did the man go to the dentist? Tooth hurt-y.
Did you hear about the man who fell into an upholstery machine? He's fully recovered.
Why didn't the melons get married? Because they cantaloupe.
What kind of egg did the evil chicken lay? A deviled egg.
Why did the coach go to the bank? To get his quarter back.
Why are skeletons so calm? Because nothing gets under their skin.
What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just waved.
How do moths swim? Using the butterfly stroke.
How do you make a Kleenex dance? Put a little boogie in it!
What do you get from a pampered cow? Spoiled milk!
What do you call an illegally parked frog? Toad.
Where do baby cats learn to swim? The kitty pool.
Why are spiders so smart? They can find everything on the web.
Southern Living
~A woman in England was rescued after taking a tumble down a ravine—all thanks to her pet cat's "persistent" meows. Share your feline's un-catlike behavior! My cat used to follow the dog to the fence and "bark" at the cars. I also had a cat that would hang on the screen door and ring the door bell.
~Ever had to call a locksmith because you locked your keys in your car. Apparently, Jeff from Newsboys left his car idling and locked the doors. The band members took turns trying to pop the lock, but no go. They had to call in the pros!
~Just read a health tip that says the zinc in cashews can boost your immune system. So, does that mean you can smear that white zinc lotion all over your body and create a virus free zone? I’m trying it. Who’s with me???
~Are you heading out on vacation this week? Sharon tweeting, “My son’s favorite thing about our trip to beach? The snacks.” Sounds about right. Make sure you pack enough! Boy moms get it.
~More than 40 percent of people lie about an event's start time so their tardy friends aren't late. Are you deceitful one or the tardy one?
~If you’re craving chocolate, does eating a tiny chocolate kiss satisfy your sweet tooth? Or, does it just make you want to eat the whole bag? I’ve had four. I think I can stop, but it’s gonna be tough.
~In this era of Zoom calls and working from home, Caffeinated Dad tweeted, “Auto-correct changed, "I'm bad at house plants" to "I'm bad at house pants" Turns out both statements are correct.
~Who else uses only an antenna to get local TV channels? My internet was out all weekend so that’s all the choices I had…ironically I landed on an episode of According to Jim, the one where Cheryl trades in his large flat screen TV for an 1960s model that only gets three channels and no remote, so he had to get up to change the channel. Remember those days???
~Well, it’s dinner time and Moms, you are not alone! Real Life Mommy tweeting, “I made dinner and every one of my children ate it without complaint…and then I woke up.”
~A survey of snackers reveals nearly half have stashed their favorite treats in hidden spots around the house? Many admit they have no plans to share them with the rest of their family. What's your hiding spot-worthy snack?
~You know you’ve mastered marriage when you ask your spouse to hand you “that thingy” over there and they know exactly what that means.
~Have you seen the new Space Jam movie? It wasn’t just the Looney Tunes universe, but also many of the Warner Brothers worlds, so we get a fist bump in the stands at the basketball game between Iron Giant and King Kong. 90’s kids are loving it!
~Summer heat is back in full force. Moms want to know what the guy who invented bubbles as a toy for kids was thinking. Was it, “Hmm..how can we make summer stickier and worse?”
~Some truth from the moms of Twitter: “It’s all fun and games until there isn’t enough mac and cheese for seconds.” Oh, yeah. It’s all-out war when that happens!
~Women 30 plus what’s your advice for 20 somethings? Some of the responses:
- You don't have to believe what everyone else does.
- “No.” is a complete sentence.
- Be kind to yourself and others.
And my favorite: Boys are icky, so be picky…
~Remember it’s the little moments that makes the biggest impact in your life. So, moms take time to appreciate the bunch of dandelions your little girl is handing you and put them in water in a special vase. What are the little moments you treasure?
-Demi says she's making homemade pizzas! I loved doing that with the kids. Everyone gets a pizza crust and you put your favorite toppings on your own pie. I actually think we started that because one of us liked pineapple pizza! Demi is doing VEGAN beef, mozzarella cheese and diced tomatoes. OK...ew. Share your weird or favorite toppings!
~So…a piece of fudge in the staff fridge with nobody’s name on it is fair game, right? The old forgiveness instead of permission thing…
~Our Facebook friend/listener Carol says, “I’ll see your “I Voted Today” sticker and raise you an “I Gave Blood” sticker. Be like Carol!
~Here’s a sure-fire way to get out of bringing a dish to potluck dinners for the rest of your life. A Jello mold filled with olives, mushrooms, peas, carrots and ham chunks – and trimmed with that cheese in a can. You’re welcome.
~Note to self: A cookies n cream milk shake is not a proper meal replacement shake...Says who? Just add a multivitamin and you're good to go.
~Favorite tweet of the day! A quote from Snoopy…”Keep looking up. That’s the secret of life. I’m looking up to my God. How about you? [Look Up Child-Lauren Daigle]
~Serious poll on Twitter: Brooklyn wants to know how many Oreos you eat in one sitting. April says, “If it’s Double Stuf, 4. If it’s regular, 8. If they are the Christmas Oreos with the red filling, eat the row. If it’s thins, they are not worth the calories.”
~I was heading to the break room to get some coffee and a snack and I passed by one of the studios. There’s a sign that says “Do not feed the DJ.” Ok, I’m putting the cookies back…
~We can’t show you the photo on the radio, so you’ll have to go to cnet.com to see a glorious nebula that looks like a glowing butterfly. The distinctive shape comes from two stars at the center after one star reaches the end of its life and cast off its outer layers. The other star interferes with the flow of gas, forming the two-lobed shape. Experts say these cosmic rarities showcase the visual wonders of space and how the death of stars can lead to great beauty. What I see is God is painting the Heavens with a sweet reminder of our transformation in Christ!
CNet
~How do you handle screen time in your house? I don’t even have children in the house anymore and I used 70 percent of my data limit in one weekend, so I put myself in a timeout… Call me with your house rules!
~What do kids carry around in their pockets? SaveSpot reached out to parents of kids under 6 in 16 countries and asked their kids to empty their pockets. Here’s part of their haul:
-William in the U.S. had a transformer, a Lego Harry Potter, and three gummy bears.
-Nadia in the Ukraine stashed a bunny doll on a string, a pink chap stick, some coins and some play money.
-Wyatt in the UK was ready for a long day of fun. He squirreled away a Lego Batmobile, a tank, a Linus from Peanuts, a race car, a pebble, a tiny T-Rex, a cereal bar, a marble and a stick.
-The weirdest thing they found? One mom in India said she found some toy cars and her husband’s credit card.
What's in your kids' pockets?
Good News Network
~When church complaints start on Sunday morning, here's have a proven solution. Tell your family, "God loves us right where we are, so love God, love others and GET IN THE VAN!”
~Did you ever torture your brothers and sisters in the back seat as a kid? I once caught my son pushing his sister out of the car with his foot while we were at the Taco Bell drive-thru lane! Share your sibling war stories.
~Who car is named "Mom's Taxi?" According to Parents magazine, parents spend 10-40 hours a week driving kids around. Where are you taking them today? Call us on the studio line!
~According to a recent survey, 85 percent of people sing in the car, but 70 percent of people say they only do it when they're alone. So, this is for the 15 percent: (Upbeat song) Sing it out!
~What would you say to your younger self if you could go back in time? I’d say, (name) you might want to rethink the leg warmers and headbands (your era's fashion fail)!
~I’m eating a lot of salads again and I’ve got a great tip to ward off the boredom of the same two salads every day. I went through the sandwich shop drive through today and got my favorite sandwich as a salad! I could get a club salad, a meatball salad, a chicken bacon salad, a tuna salad. It’s genius. Why didn’t I think of that before???? Only problem is…I’m hungry again already!
~Iced Tea Day (was June 10). Remember Sun tea? That was one of my chores when I was in high school. I had to make sure I put the pitcher outside when I got home from school, so we’d have brewed iced tea in time for dinner! It takes 3-5 hours to brew it. These days, I just use those instant tea packets. Or I grab a big can of Arizona Peach tea! What’s your favorite?
~I keep going back to the staff kitchen to hunt for low-carb snacks, so I can relate to this tweet from Lloyd: “Microwaves should have a 'night mode’ setting so it doesn’t beep.” And in the thread, JC says, “Bought a hi-tech model that does that. But, I gained 5 pounds in one month." Gary’s looking out for our health and tweeted that we need alarms on the fridge. I actually have a nighttime snacker alarm. When I open the fridge a little piggy inside starts oinking at me. Kinda rude, but it’s pretty effective…
~We took leaps and bounds in modern inventions in just three decades. (June 10) 1943, the ball point pen was invented. Jump ahead to 1977, Apple Computers manufactures the Apple II. Now we have a computer in our pocket and we takes notes with a stylus. Who misses the old days of handwritten letters? What technology would you do without?
~So, the makers of the WHATCHAMACALLIT candy bar are asking candy connoisseurs to name their next bar. It has chocolate, chocolaty crisps and peanut butter. They couldn’t come up with a name for the first one and they’re stumped again? (June 2020)
~From giggles to full-on belly laughs, laughter not only puts you a better mood, it boosts your immune system, reduces stress and creates a positive outlook on life. Bring on the Dad jokes! ["Why don't eggs tell jokes? They'd crack each other up."]
More Dad Jokes
~I was thinking about everything we’re missing being cooped up in the house. Family get togethers, hugs, going to the movies…What’s the first thing you’re doing after the quarantine and stay-at-home orders are lifted? Call me on the studio line!
~Here's a truth bomb. Research shows that daily potato chip consumption can contribute to two pounds of belly fat every four years. Regular consumption of French fries resulted in 3.3 pounds gained every four years. So STEP AWAY FROM THE CHIPS AND FRIES, PEOPLE. Get the carrots and celery with your order of wings! You’re welcome.
~I did something productive with my time at home yesterday. I spent two hours deleting emails. Going paperless is supposed to make our lives easier, so why is trashing emails so complicated???? Why can’t you BULK delete in the G-Mail app???? You have to do that on the computer! Thanks for listening. Carry on...
~Here’s a fun time-killer. Grab the closest book to you, turn to page 47, and post the fourth sentence. Don't mention the title.
"There is a reason the windshield is bigger than the rear view mirror. Your future matters more than your past.”
“I appear to be as athletic as a boiled chicken sandwich under a heat lamp in the cafeteria.”
Try it and call the studio line with your gems, Page 47, fourth line.
~So, I’m a fan of the Google Doodle. They’re so creative and I think underrated art. Today’s (doodle has the letters in the search engine’s logo following the social distancing rules and doing approved activities at home. The G is Reading a book, the double o’s are dancing and listening to music, the little g and the e are chatting on the phone and the l is getting in a workout. Open your browser to check it out. Stay home. Help Save lives.
~There’s a lot of things we’re doing differently these days. Washing your hands a gazillion times a day. Sanitizing the keyboard, your phone, your debit card. I just discovered a new hiccup from my usual…When you eat Cheetos, do not lick the Cheeto dust off your fingers. I know you want to. Resist the urge. You’ll have to finish the bag, then go wash your hands. No Cheeto cheating.
~What are some things you’re doing to take care of yourself? I did my own manicure. It’s not good. The pedicure is a different story. At a certain point in life, it’s hard to reach your toes by yourself…
~Huggers are really struggling these days. A teacher that’s a hugger: That’s a tragedy. When things get back to normal, there’s going to be a lot of hugging happening. Fair warning!
~Do you find yourself abandoning all reason when it comes to sticking with your diet or just eating healthy? Well, here’s a good tip: Work at home in your swim suit instead of your pajamas. That should do the trick.
~Here’s what happens when empty nesters can’t pawn the dish chore off to the kids anymore and you’re both trying to work from home at least part time right now:
Me: Can you please rinse your dishes before you put them in the sink? There’s milk and cereal getting smelly in here!
Hubby: Um, that was your bowl.
Me: “Oh.”
~Have you seen this online? Balloon artists are leaving inflatable bouquets around their towns in an effort to spread positive energy amid coronavirus. It’s the #OneMillionBubbles movement.
~I’m learning that the more I watch the news, the more anxious I get, so I’m putting parental controls on the news channels. I limit my screen time to 15 minutes twice a day and put myself in the corner if I break the rules!
~Is this you this week? You put on a track shoe to head out for a morning walk, remember you have to start the crock pot, then the dryer dings and 30 minutes later, you’re catching up on that report your boss asked for by lunch with a rugrat tugging on your sweatpants and wondering why you’re only wearing one shoe. It’s OK! God’s grace covers it all!
~It’s the little things these days! I may not have enough paper products, but I just got a notification that my no show odor control socks have free shipping! You're welcome!
~Kids love slime, so here’s the SLIME How TO: Mix half a bottle of glue with a drop or two of food coloring, then add a fourth cup of water until mixed completely. In a separate cup make your "activator" —two cups of water and a fourth cup of baking soda — then add 2 teaspoons of the activator to your slime mix and knead together until it stops being sticky (well, less sticky). If you want to make "floam," you can mix in some Styrofoam beads.
~“I think the proper term for ‘senior’ woman should be queen-ager. That is all. Carry on.”
~I love this encouragement from Sarah Walton: “In case you’re being hard on yourself because you feel like you failed as a parent today... My child just licked a toilet plunger.” Throwing up emoji.
~So, the ketchup debate has been settled. Experts weighed in and confirmed that ketchup DOES NOT have to be stored in the fridge! What about you? Who will win the pantry vs. fridge ketchup debate in your house?
~13-year-old Darius has a heart for shelter pets and he’s trying to help them find forever homes by sewing bow ties for them to show off to potential adoptive families. Since he started, he’s made 500 bow ties and helped adopt out 100 dogs and cats.
Good News Network
~Have you tried intermittent fasting? Does that mean instead of eating the family size bag of Cool Ranch Doritos over the course of an entire day, I have to do it all between 12-7 p.m., right?
~OK, I just don’t get this whole craze of impossible burgers and now KFC has vegan fried chicken. It’s wheat, soy and pea protein and bunch of other ingredients I can’t pronounce. My question to vegans is this: if you don’t want to eat meat, why do you want to eat something that tastes like meat? I say meat or no meat and skip the fake alternatives. That isn’t healthy anyway, according to Women's Health. Don’t hate me, but I’ll just eat my grilled chicken salad and be happy.
Women's Health
~I’m scrolling through my Twitter feed, and I see a tweet from Everyday Health: “Nobody wants to be told what to eat. You're taking away their freedom." Then I see this one from Women’s Health: "I stopped eating anything boxed, canned, bagged, or frozen." So, I feel shackled already. That means I have to SHOP every day and COOK everything from fresh for every meal and snack I put in my mouth!! I’m telling you, that is never going happen and now I just feel like grabbing a bag of M&Ms. HELP!!!
~I totally relate to this from author Sarah Walton: “I bought my kids a new shampoo that apparently has avocado oil in it with a picture of an avocado on the front. Naturally, my daughter saw it and called down from the bathroom - “Mom! Is there guacamole in my shampoo?!” A comedian in the making…
~Ever have Ranch dressing so good you went to the kitchen looking for something to dip in it? Is it wrong to just eat the ranch by itself? Asking for a friend…
~What’s the oldest thing you’ve found in your pantry? Amanda tweeted: “My husband picked up the red pepper flakes, and the ‘sell by’ date was April 2009! Our daughter responded, “Awww, We’ve grown up together.”
Amanda Geaney
~Are you having 'senior moments' lately? Well, you need to go take a walk. A study found that when seniors regularly took brisk walks for one year, the hippocampus, the area of the brain involved in memory, actually grew in size. It typically shrinks as we age, so it needs a workout, too! Now, if I could just remember where my tennis shoes are, I could go take that walk….
~If your cat could talk, what would it say?
“Ummm, excuse me. You’re in my recliner…."
"Hey, buddy, can you pass me the catnip jar? Thanks..."
"Sorry...I missed." (eyeing suspicious piles outside the litter box)
"Do you mind turning out that light (at noon)? I'm napping over here."
~Sugarfreemom.com has a video recipe today for coconut flour tortilla wraps. She says they are gluten-free, sugar-free, wheat-free and keto-friendly. I’m eating low-carb, so I’m downloading the recipe, but it reminded me of another video I saw the other day– the chef is adding all the ingredients for a zero carb, zero sugar, zero wheat creation. And, you guessed it. It’s just air. He’s mime-baking!
~Wise words from Mark, TheCatWhisperer on Twitter: "80% of parenting is replying to your kids “wow, that’s cool” without even looking."
Twitter/@TheCatWhisprer
~How's this for a morning news headline? Family Prays At McDonald's, Food Miraculously Transforms Into Chick-Fil-A. Before you spit Chick-Fil-A sauce out of your nose, it's from the SATIRE site Babylon Bee... #fakenews
~The wisdom of older siblings...7-year-old to 5-year-old: "That's your calf muscle, but once you turn 10, it turns into a cow muscle."
Author Sarah Walton
~Reducing your meat and dairy intake can help mitigate climate change. Let's just let that hang out there for a moment...WHAT??? Melissa Clark’s personal guide to eating less meat and dairy includes tips, strategies and plenty of recipes. It's the "Meat Lovers Guide to Eating Less Meat" on the New York Times website. That's a clue right there. NEW YORK. Definitely not TEXAS, MONTANA or NEBRASKA.
NYTimes
~According to a survey, one in five people say their favorite secret spot to hide money is in their shoes. So, they’re walking around all day at a hot, sweaty festival or a concert with a hundred thousand people with cash under their feet! Ewww! Remember that the next time you go to ATM machine or get cash back at the store! Where’s the Lysol????
~I love this from Comedian Mike Goodwin: “Someone close to you needs a hug....or 20 dollars. Either one will be much appreciated.”
ComedianMikeGoodwin
~You're an adult, so would you wear a onsie? They make them in our size. So, who's in? Financial guy Dave Ramsey passed on them as a gift for his wife. He tweeted a picture of an animal print onsie with the caption: "Things I didn't buy Sharon today."
Dave Ramsey
~Who can relate to this Tweet? "Some people wake up refreshed after a nap. I wake up sweaty, confused, and wondering what year it is."
~Would you take a selfie during labor? Ot let your husband snap one with you in the background? Apparently, it's becoming a trend. What do you think?
Today's Parent
~Parents want to get great pictures and video of their kids playing sports, but one thought it was a good idea to use a drone to get close-up shots of the action on the soccer field. The problem? When a kid kicks the soccer ball into the air and takes out the drone.
Mashable
~Real life parenting: Stella Maddox posted, "What qualifies one to be a parenting expert? My kids are still alive and can run the microwave so I think I can safely add it to my resume."
~We all have that friend. The one who can order pizza every day of the week and be completely content. Well, here’s the perfect gift idea for that guy: The Pizza Pouch. It’s a pizza slice-shaped zip lock bag on a lanyard that he can hang around his neck. He will never go pizza-less again. It's available online from a company aptly named Stupididiotic.
Huffington Post
~Here's a billion dollar idea! A smoke detector that shuts off when you yell, "I'm making dinner!" I need that! Maybe a smoke alarm that goes off before I burn the chicken...or the tomato soup boils over!
~Being a drama queen is an actual personality disorder known as the Histrionic personality disorder that affects women 4 times more than men. That explains a lot!
~The clock in the studio is already set to Daylight Savings Time! We don’t “spring forward” until March 10 (2024)! I’m guessing the morning team wants to make sure we don’t forget! If I leave an hour early tonight, you’ll know why.
~I have a slight dilemma. What do you do if you eat all your carrots, but you still have some of the good ranch dressing left? Do you go back for more carrots or a spoon? I’m leaning toward the spoon to be honest…
~As believers we strive to do everything for the glory of God. We want to hear Him tell us well done one day. Well, keep it up, but remember, well done is for good and faithful servants, not steaks.
~If you’ve ever wondered how a vegetarian finds a comfort food dish without pasta or rice, well I figured out the key. It’s cauliflower rice! Mix in some mushrooms, Alfredo cheese sauce and Paula Dean butter, ya’ll!
~The other day I had to make three U-turns to get where I was going, and my GPS was huffing and rolling her eyes. Again?! Recalculating... Jesus GPS…that’s what I need.
~I love these food packages. If you’re watching your diet this month, the marketing can be tricky. The beef stick I just ate said ZERO sugar, 4 grams of protein and in smaller letters: NOT A LOW CALORIE FOOD. And there was no mention of the fat content. I ate it anyway…
~Pro Tip: When you have a friend checking on your house and your cat when you're out of town, it's a good idea to let them know the burglar alarm is set. Oops. It's always an adventure being my friend...
~The key to dressing in winter is LAYERS! But, apparently (co-worker) missed that cold weather 101 class. I had to peel off a couple of those layers when I came in the studio because the heater was cranked up into the stratosphere!
~Advice for Southerners driving in the snow and ice: Pretend your taking your grandma to church. There's a platter of biscuits and two gallons of sweet tea in glass jars in the back seat. She's wearing a new dress and holding a crock pot full of gravy. You're good to go!
~I left my travel mug in my car yesterday, so there was a frozen chunk of old coffee in the bottom! Good thing I didn't leave that 12- pack of Cherry Coke in my trunk. So, when the temps plummet below freezing, bring in your plants, your pets and your stray cups!
~There's an old song called Slip, Sliding Away. That's what many of us have been doing in this winter weather. Here's the advice from the weather experts: Southerners: You need to just stay home. Northerners: You're gonna need your big coat.
~So I showed up to my doctor’s appointment today proud of myself that I was actually on time, and they couldn’t find me on the schedule. Apparently, I was a week early for my checkup. So, I’m setting up my Google Assistant. “Hey, Google. Organize my life, please.”
~I have the perfect pair of jeans. I bought them when I hit my goal weight. So, now I don’t even need to get on the scale. When they don’t fit, it’s like they’re telling me “Step away from the chips and dip and nobody gets hurt!”
~ Many of us are back to counting our calories and watching what we eat in the New Year. Well, I’m good on my carbs, but my app says I have only 3 grams of fat left for the day. So, it looks like I can have 20 stalks of celery with ONE tablespoon of low fat ranch dressing for a snack! Yummy!
~I’m doing a low-carb diet and my total carb count for dinner was only 6 grams! (Tuna, keto bread and cheddar cheese) So, I have 40 carbs left for the day. I looked at the pop tarts in the kitchen, and one is 35 carbs...Somebody talk me out of it!
~Praying for the day when I can breathe through both nostrils again! What’s your best remedy?
[Listener and Reddit suggestions:]
-Forbidden midnight snacks to take your mind off your suffering! It couldn't hurt anything, but the number on your scale.
-Hot beverages - It’s a physiological effect of the drink where the taste, smell and temperature promote salivation and air-way mucus secretions to lubricate and soothe the upper air-ways. That might be TMI!
-Spicy foods - Capsaicin irritates mucous membranes, which results in a runny nose, thereby softening any nasal obstruction. At this point, I'm open to snorting some Tabasco sauce (Ahhh!) Don't do that! We might have to call an ambulance!
-Very light physical activity. The body goes "Oh! I have to move. That means I have to breathe!" The actual science: You can loosen sinus congestion and pressure through the increase in circulation. Increasing your body's core temperature also loosens mucus.
~If you see a reel in your feed that says Amazon finds you need….don’t click on it! It’s a lie. Take a shopping break!
~Don't forget to set your scales back 15 pounds on Wednesday night! [Thanksgiving]
~My motto this holiday season: "Eat, drink and be thankful for stretchy pants!
~Apparently (co-worker) and I are related. We both come from families that consider gravy a beverage! May your gravy boat runneth over! [Fill My Cup, Andrew Rip]
~This is something you'll hear a lot during the holidays: "I'm so stuffed, I can't eat one more bite! Oh, look! Pie!"
~It wouldn't be the holidays without turkeys, fruitcakes, and nuts. But enough about the relatives...
~Do you have your stretchy pants ready? The good thing about holiday feasts is that no more how much we gain, at least our shoes will still fit!
~I hear Thanksgiving travel is going a lot smoother than last year. And, some of the boarding rules have changed. Not so for Tim Hawkins! [Air Travel]
~Leftovers from the staff birthdays. So, if it’s low carb ice cream, zero sugar chocolate sauce, it’s OK to have a sundae for my dinner? Right? Too late. Better to ask forgiveness than permission.
~What are the odds that a snake would fall out of the sky and wrap itself around your arm, and then the hawk that dropped it attacks the snake and your arm to get it back? Imagine being that person. Well it actually happened to a woman doing yard work in Silsbee, Texas near Beaumont! Her glasses saved her from a snake bite, but the hawk’s claws did some damage to her arm. She’s OK, and has a whopper of a story to tell!
~It’s yard sprucing up season, and if you like garden gnomes, I apologize in advance. I’ve never been a fan of the cute – but creepy little guys, but I just might buy this one. It’s a T-Rex clutching several gnomes in its claws and teeth. It’s called the Great Garden Gnome Massacre. Just take my money!
~Can laundry ever be DONE? Everything washed, dried, and put away? Husbands don't seem to understand that laundry is always in the process of being done, but NEVER completely done, unless you count that 10 minutes that the hamper is empty after the last load is put away! If you’ve figured that one out, let me know!
~The a/c in the studio sounded like an espresso machine. I don’t know if that’s good or bad, but now I want a latte.
~OK, guys, you’re on. Call me with your best Dad joked. I'll start:
I thought the dryer was shrinking my clothes. Turns out it was the refrigerator all along.
How do celebrities stay cool? They have many fans.
What's Forrest Gump's Facebook password? 1forest1.
What do you call it when Batman skips church? Christian Bale.
What time did the man go to the dentist? Tooth hurt-y.
Did you hear about the man who fell into an upholstery machine? He's fully recovered.
Why didn't the melons get married? Because they cantaloupe.
What kind of egg did the evil chicken lay? A deviled egg.
Why did the coach go to the bank? To get his quarter back.
Why are skeletons so calm? Because nothing gets under their skin.
What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just waved.
How do moths swim? Using the butterfly stroke.
How do you make a Kleenex dance? Put a little boogie in it!
What do you get from a pampered cow? Spoiled milk!
What do you call an illegally parked frog? Toad.
Where do baby cats learn to swim? The kitty pool.
Why are spiders so smart? They can find everything on the web.
Southern Living
~A woman in England was rescued after taking a tumble down a ravine—all thanks to her pet cat's "persistent" meows. Share your feline's un-catlike behavior! My cat used to follow the dog to the fence and "bark" at the cars. I also had a cat that would hang on the screen door and ring the door bell.
~Ever had to call a locksmith because you locked your keys in your car. Apparently, Jeff from Newsboys left his car idling and locked the doors. The band members took turns trying to pop the lock, but no go. They had to call in the pros!
~Just read a health tip that says the zinc in cashews can boost your immune system. So, does that mean you can smear that white zinc lotion all over your body and create a virus free zone? I’m trying it. Who’s with me???
~Are you heading out on vacation this week? Sharon tweeting, “My son’s favorite thing about our trip to beach? The snacks.” Sounds about right. Make sure you pack enough! Boy moms get it.
~More than 40 percent of people lie about an event's start time so their tardy friends aren't late. Are you deceitful one or the tardy one?
~If you’re craving chocolate, does eating a tiny chocolate kiss satisfy your sweet tooth? Or, does it just make you want to eat the whole bag? I’ve had four. I think I can stop, but it’s gonna be tough.
~In this era of Zoom calls and working from home, Caffeinated Dad tweeted, “Auto-correct changed, "I'm bad at house plants" to "I'm bad at house pants" Turns out both statements are correct.
~Who else uses only an antenna to get local TV channels? My internet was out all weekend so that’s all the choices I had…ironically I landed on an episode of According to Jim, the one where Cheryl trades in his large flat screen TV for an 1960s model that only gets three channels and no remote, so he had to get up to change the channel. Remember those days???
~Well, it’s dinner time and Moms, you are not alone! Real Life Mommy tweeting, “I made dinner and every one of my children ate it without complaint…and then I woke up.”
~A survey of snackers reveals nearly half have stashed their favorite treats in hidden spots around the house? Many admit they have no plans to share them with the rest of their family. What's your hiding spot-worthy snack?
~You know you’ve mastered marriage when you ask your spouse to hand you “that thingy” over there and they know exactly what that means.
~Have you seen the new Space Jam movie? It wasn’t just the Looney Tunes universe, but also many of the Warner Brothers worlds, so we get a fist bump in the stands at the basketball game between Iron Giant and King Kong. 90’s kids are loving it!
~Summer heat is back in full force. Moms want to know what the guy who invented bubbles as a toy for kids was thinking. Was it, “Hmm..how can we make summer stickier and worse?”
~Some truth from the moms of Twitter: “It’s all fun and games until there isn’t enough mac and cheese for seconds.” Oh, yeah. It’s all-out war when that happens!
~Women 30 plus what’s your advice for 20 somethings? Some of the responses:
- You don't have to believe what everyone else does.
- “No.” is a complete sentence.
- Be kind to yourself and others.
And my favorite: Boys are icky, so be picky…
~Remember it’s the little moments that makes the biggest impact in your life. So, moms take time to appreciate the bunch of dandelions your little girl is handing you and put them in water in a special vase. What are the little moments you treasure?
-Demi says she's making homemade pizzas! I loved doing that with the kids. Everyone gets a pizza crust and you put your favorite toppings on your own pie. I actually think we started that because one of us liked pineapple pizza! Demi is doing VEGAN beef, mozzarella cheese and diced tomatoes. OK...ew. Share your weird or favorite toppings!
~So…a piece of fudge in the staff fridge with nobody’s name on it is fair game, right? The old forgiveness instead of permission thing…
~Our Facebook friend/listener Carol says, “I’ll see your “I Voted Today” sticker and raise you an “I Gave Blood” sticker. Be like Carol!
~Here’s a sure-fire way to get out of bringing a dish to potluck dinners for the rest of your life. A Jello mold filled with olives, mushrooms, peas, carrots and ham chunks – and trimmed with that cheese in a can. You’re welcome.
~Note to self: A cookies n cream milk shake is not a proper meal replacement shake...Says who? Just add a multivitamin and you're good to go.
~Favorite tweet of the day! A quote from Snoopy…”Keep looking up. That’s the secret of life. I’m looking up to my God. How about you? [Look Up Child-Lauren Daigle]
~Serious poll on Twitter: Brooklyn wants to know how many Oreos you eat in one sitting. April says, “If it’s Double Stuf, 4. If it’s regular, 8. If they are the Christmas Oreos with the red filling, eat the row. If it’s thins, they are not worth the calories.”
~I was heading to the break room to get some coffee and a snack and I passed by one of the studios. There’s a sign that says “Do not feed the DJ.” Ok, I’m putting the cookies back…
~We can’t show you the photo on the radio, so you’ll have to go to cnet.com to see a glorious nebula that looks like a glowing butterfly. The distinctive shape comes from two stars at the center after one star reaches the end of its life and cast off its outer layers. The other star interferes with the flow of gas, forming the two-lobed shape. Experts say these cosmic rarities showcase the visual wonders of space and how the death of stars can lead to great beauty. What I see is God is painting the Heavens with a sweet reminder of our transformation in Christ!
CNet
~How do you handle screen time in your house? I don’t even have children in the house anymore and I used 70 percent of my data limit in one weekend, so I put myself in a timeout… Call me with your house rules!
~What do kids carry around in their pockets? SaveSpot reached out to parents of kids under 6 in 16 countries and asked their kids to empty their pockets. Here’s part of their haul:
-William in the U.S. had a transformer, a Lego Harry Potter, and three gummy bears.
-Nadia in the Ukraine stashed a bunny doll on a string, a pink chap stick, some coins and some play money.
-Wyatt in the UK was ready for a long day of fun. He squirreled away a Lego Batmobile, a tank, a Linus from Peanuts, a race car, a pebble, a tiny T-Rex, a cereal bar, a marble and a stick.
-The weirdest thing they found? One mom in India said she found some toy cars and her husband’s credit card.
What's in your kids' pockets?
Good News Network
~When church complaints start on Sunday morning, here's have a proven solution. Tell your family, "God loves us right where we are, so love God, love others and GET IN THE VAN!”
~Did you ever torture your brothers and sisters in the back seat as a kid? I once caught my son pushing his sister out of the car with his foot while we were at the Taco Bell drive-thru lane! Share your sibling war stories.
~Who car is named "Mom's Taxi?" According to Parents magazine, parents spend 10-40 hours a week driving kids around. Where are you taking them today? Call us on the studio line!
~According to a recent survey, 85 percent of people sing in the car, but 70 percent of people say they only do it when they're alone. So, this is for the 15 percent: (Upbeat song) Sing it out!
~What would you say to your younger self if you could go back in time? I’d say, (name) you might want to rethink the leg warmers and headbands (your era's fashion fail)!
~I’m eating a lot of salads again and I’ve got a great tip to ward off the boredom of the same two salads every day. I went through the sandwich shop drive through today and got my favorite sandwich as a salad! I could get a club salad, a meatball salad, a chicken bacon salad, a tuna salad. It’s genius. Why didn’t I think of that before???? Only problem is…I’m hungry again already!
~Iced Tea Day (was June 10). Remember Sun tea? That was one of my chores when I was in high school. I had to make sure I put the pitcher outside when I got home from school, so we’d have brewed iced tea in time for dinner! It takes 3-5 hours to brew it. These days, I just use those instant tea packets. Or I grab a big can of Arizona Peach tea! What’s your favorite?
~I keep going back to the staff kitchen to hunt for low-carb snacks, so I can relate to this tweet from Lloyd: “Microwaves should have a 'night mode’ setting so it doesn’t beep.” And in the thread, JC says, “Bought a hi-tech model that does that. But, I gained 5 pounds in one month." Gary’s looking out for our health and tweeted that we need alarms on the fridge. I actually have a nighttime snacker alarm. When I open the fridge a little piggy inside starts oinking at me. Kinda rude, but it’s pretty effective…
~We took leaps and bounds in modern inventions in just three decades. (June 10) 1943, the ball point pen was invented. Jump ahead to 1977, Apple Computers manufactures the Apple II. Now we have a computer in our pocket and we takes notes with a stylus. Who misses the old days of handwritten letters? What technology would you do without?
~So, the makers of the WHATCHAMACALLIT candy bar are asking candy connoisseurs to name their next bar. It has chocolate, chocolaty crisps and peanut butter. They couldn’t come up with a name for the first one and they’re stumped again? (June 2020)
~From giggles to full-on belly laughs, laughter not only puts you a better mood, it boosts your immune system, reduces stress and creates a positive outlook on life. Bring on the Dad jokes! ["Why don't eggs tell jokes? They'd crack each other up."]
More Dad Jokes
~I was thinking about everything we’re missing being cooped up in the house. Family get togethers, hugs, going to the movies…What’s the first thing you’re doing after the quarantine and stay-at-home orders are lifted? Call me on the studio line!
~Here's a truth bomb. Research shows that daily potato chip consumption can contribute to two pounds of belly fat every four years. Regular consumption of French fries resulted in 3.3 pounds gained every four years. So STEP AWAY FROM THE CHIPS AND FRIES, PEOPLE. Get the carrots and celery with your order of wings! You’re welcome.
~I did something productive with my time at home yesterday. I spent two hours deleting emails. Going paperless is supposed to make our lives easier, so why is trashing emails so complicated???? Why can’t you BULK delete in the G-Mail app???? You have to do that on the computer! Thanks for listening. Carry on...
~Here’s a fun time-killer. Grab the closest book to you, turn to page 47, and post the fourth sentence. Don't mention the title.
"There is a reason the windshield is bigger than the rear view mirror. Your future matters more than your past.”
“I appear to be as athletic as a boiled chicken sandwich under a heat lamp in the cafeteria.”
Try it and call the studio line with your gems, Page 47, fourth line.
~So, I’m a fan of the Google Doodle. They’re so creative and I think underrated art. Today’s (doodle has the letters in the search engine’s logo following the social distancing rules and doing approved activities at home. The G is Reading a book, the double o’s are dancing and listening to music, the little g and the e are chatting on the phone and the l is getting in a workout. Open your browser to check it out. Stay home. Help Save lives.
~There’s a lot of things we’re doing differently these days. Washing your hands a gazillion times a day. Sanitizing the keyboard, your phone, your debit card. I just discovered a new hiccup from my usual…When you eat Cheetos, do not lick the Cheeto dust off your fingers. I know you want to. Resist the urge. You’ll have to finish the bag, then go wash your hands. No Cheeto cheating.
~What are some things you’re doing to take care of yourself? I did my own manicure. It’s not good. The pedicure is a different story. At a certain point in life, it’s hard to reach your toes by yourself…
~Huggers are really struggling these days. A teacher that’s a hugger: That’s a tragedy. When things get back to normal, there’s going to be a lot of hugging happening. Fair warning!
~Do you find yourself abandoning all reason when it comes to sticking with your diet or just eating healthy? Well, here’s a good tip: Work at home in your swim suit instead of your pajamas. That should do the trick.
~Here’s what happens when empty nesters can’t pawn the dish chore off to the kids anymore and you’re both trying to work from home at least part time right now:
Me: Can you please rinse your dishes before you put them in the sink? There’s milk and cereal getting smelly in here!
Hubby: Um, that was your bowl.
Me: “Oh.”
~Have you seen this online? Balloon artists are leaving inflatable bouquets around their towns in an effort to spread positive energy amid coronavirus. It’s the #OneMillionBubbles movement.
~I’m learning that the more I watch the news, the more anxious I get, so I’m putting parental controls on the news channels. I limit my screen time to 15 minutes twice a day and put myself in the corner if I break the rules!
~Is this you this week? You put on a track shoe to head out for a morning walk, remember you have to start the crock pot, then the dryer dings and 30 minutes later, you’re catching up on that report your boss asked for by lunch with a rugrat tugging on your sweatpants and wondering why you’re only wearing one shoe. It’s OK! God’s grace covers it all!
~It’s the little things these days! I may not have enough paper products, but I just got a notification that my no show odor control socks have free shipping! You're welcome!
~Kids love slime, so here’s the SLIME How TO: Mix half a bottle of glue with a drop or two of food coloring, then add a fourth cup of water until mixed completely. In a separate cup make your "activator" —two cups of water and a fourth cup of baking soda — then add 2 teaspoons of the activator to your slime mix and knead together until it stops being sticky (well, less sticky). If you want to make "floam," you can mix in some Styrofoam beads.
~“I think the proper term for ‘senior’ woman should be queen-ager. That is all. Carry on.”
~I love this encouragement from Sarah Walton: “In case you’re being hard on yourself because you feel like you failed as a parent today... My child just licked a toilet plunger.” Throwing up emoji.
~So, the ketchup debate has been settled. Experts weighed in and confirmed that ketchup DOES NOT have to be stored in the fridge! What about you? Who will win the pantry vs. fridge ketchup debate in your house?
~13-year-old Darius has a heart for shelter pets and he’s trying to help them find forever homes by sewing bow ties for them to show off to potential adoptive families. Since he started, he’s made 500 bow ties and helped adopt out 100 dogs and cats.
Good News Network
~Have you tried intermittent fasting? Does that mean instead of eating the family size bag of Cool Ranch Doritos over the course of an entire day, I have to do it all between 12-7 p.m., right?
~OK, I just don’t get this whole craze of impossible burgers and now KFC has vegan fried chicken. It’s wheat, soy and pea protein and bunch of other ingredients I can’t pronounce. My question to vegans is this: if you don’t want to eat meat, why do you want to eat something that tastes like meat? I say meat or no meat and skip the fake alternatives. That isn’t healthy anyway, according to Women's Health. Don’t hate me, but I’ll just eat my grilled chicken salad and be happy.
Women's Health
~I’m scrolling through my Twitter feed, and I see a tweet from Everyday Health: “Nobody wants to be told what to eat. You're taking away their freedom." Then I see this one from Women’s Health: "I stopped eating anything boxed, canned, bagged, or frozen." So, I feel shackled already. That means I have to SHOP every day and COOK everything from fresh for every meal and snack I put in my mouth!! I’m telling you, that is never going happen and now I just feel like grabbing a bag of M&Ms. HELP!!!
~I totally relate to this from author Sarah Walton: “I bought my kids a new shampoo that apparently has avocado oil in it with a picture of an avocado on the front. Naturally, my daughter saw it and called down from the bathroom - “Mom! Is there guacamole in my shampoo?!” A comedian in the making…
~Ever have Ranch dressing so good you went to the kitchen looking for something to dip in it? Is it wrong to just eat the ranch by itself? Asking for a friend…
~What’s the oldest thing you’ve found in your pantry? Amanda tweeted: “My husband picked up the red pepper flakes, and the ‘sell by’ date was April 2009! Our daughter responded, “Awww, We’ve grown up together.”
Amanda Geaney
~Are you having 'senior moments' lately? Well, you need to go take a walk. A study found that when seniors regularly took brisk walks for one year, the hippocampus, the area of the brain involved in memory, actually grew in size. It typically shrinks as we age, so it needs a workout, too! Now, if I could just remember where my tennis shoes are, I could go take that walk….
~If your cat could talk, what would it say?
“Ummm, excuse me. You’re in my recliner…."
"Hey, buddy, can you pass me the catnip jar? Thanks..."
"Sorry...I missed." (eyeing suspicious piles outside the litter box)
"Do you mind turning out that light (at noon)? I'm napping over here."
~Sugarfreemom.com has a video recipe today for coconut flour tortilla wraps. She says they are gluten-free, sugar-free, wheat-free and keto-friendly. I’m eating low-carb, so I’m downloading the recipe, but it reminded me of another video I saw the other day– the chef is adding all the ingredients for a zero carb, zero sugar, zero wheat creation. And, you guessed it. It’s just air. He’s mime-baking!
~Wise words from Mark, TheCatWhisperer on Twitter: "80% of parenting is replying to your kids “wow, that’s cool” without even looking."
Twitter/@TheCatWhisprer
~How's this for a morning news headline? Family Prays At McDonald's, Food Miraculously Transforms Into Chick-Fil-A. Before you spit Chick-Fil-A sauce out of your nose, it's from the SATIRE site Babylon Bee... #fakenews
~The wisdom of older siblings...7-year-old to 5-year-old: "That's your calf muscle, but once you turn 10, it turns into a cow muscle."
Author Sarah Walton
~Reducing your meat and dairy intake can help mitigate climate change. Let's just let that hang out there for a moment...WHAT??? Melissa Clark’s personal guide to eating less meat and dairy includes tips, strategies and plenty of recipes. It's the "Meat Lovers Guide to Eating Less Meat" on the New York Times website. That's a clue right there. NEW YORK. Definitely not TEXAS, MONTANA or NEBRASKA.
NYTimes
~According to a survey, one in five people say their favorite secret spot to hide money is in their shoes. So, they’re walking around all day at a hot, sweaty festival or a concert with a hundred thousand people with cash under their feet! Ewww! Remember that the next time you go to ATM machine or get cash back at the store! Where’s the Lysol????
~I love this from Comedian Mike Goodwin: “Someone close to you needs a hug....or 20 dollars. Either one will be much appreciated.”
ComedianMikeGoodwin
~You're an adult, so would you wear a onsie? They make them in our size. So, who's in? Financial guy Dave Ramsey passed on them as a gift for his wife. He tweeted a picture of an animal print onsie with the caption: "Things I didn't buy Sharon today."
Dave Ramsey
~Who can relate to this Tweet? "Some people wake up refreshed after a nap. I wake up sweaty, confused, and wondering what year it is."
~Would you take a selfie during labor? Ot let your husband snap one with you in the background? Apparently, it's becoming a trend. What do you think?
Today's Parent
~Parents want to get great pictures and video of their kids playing sports, but one thought it was a good idea to use a drone to get close-up shots of the action on the soccer field. The problem? When a kid kicks the soccer ball into the air and takes out the drone.
Mashable
~Real life parenting: Stella Maddox posted, "What qualifies one to be a parenting expert? My kids are still alive and can run the microwave so I think I can safely add it to my resume."
~We all have that friend. The one who can order pizza every day of the week and be completely content. Well, here’s the perfect gift idea for that guy: The Pizza Pouch. It’s a pizza slice-shaped zip lock bag on a lanyard that he can hang around his neck. He will never go pizza-less again. It's available online from a company aptly named Stupididiotic.
Huffington Post
~Here's a billion dollar idea! A smoke detector that shuts off when you yell, "I'm making dinner!" I need that! Maybe a smoke alarm that goes off before I burn the chicken...or the tomato soup boils over!
~Being a drama queen is an actual personality disorder known as the Histrionic personality disorder that affects women 4 times more than men. That explains a lot!
